Author Archives: themouthyintrovert

Stop Thinking about what You Lost & Focus on what You are about to Gain

When God removes something from your life, its not to punish you its only to make space for something GREATER. But in everybody’s mind they really think God must have a funny way of showing that he loves you because the shit HURTS.

Have you ever sat back and had a real conversation with God? Like “look here bruh, IDK what you are trying to do but this is crazy, you got me out here in my feelings when I need to be in my bag. Can you please give me a break or something I am up to my ears in problems and I CANT TAKE NO MORE.” After having that heart to heart with God you sit back and still see your life in what seems to be shambles because you are not in control, he is. WHEEWW! that was me all 2019. Time after time I felt like I was drowning, I felt like I couldn’t press on. But here I am writing about my experiences and learning so that I can continue to grow through what I go through.

If you sit back and examine your life, it’s never as negative as it seems. Your mindset determines how you look at things and only you can change that. I know that I am meant to be above average, which is why I’m probably going through the types of struggles that I am. This fight through life is only making me tougher and more resilient for when I finally reach my full potential.

So I encourage you today and forever to not mourn over your loses but celebrate the gains that are soon to come.

~ The Mouthy Introvert

Overthinking

I know I am not the only one who constantly replays and thinks about one particular subject, or hell all things at one time on a daily basis. They say live in the moment, but I honestly don’t know what that means. My mind seems to be on autopilot and goes straight to all the questions that you could possibly ask about one thing.

Things I overthink

#1 EVERY DAMN THING

#2 Same as #1 LOL!

Maybe I’m just anxious about the endless possibilities or maybe I’m just inside my own head. I’m honestly overthinking this post right now. Its a cycle, overthinking causes me mental frustration and mental frustration causes me to overthinking. Like what the hell am I supposed to do about a cycle that seems to never end. 

DEEP SIGH

JUST BREATHE JELLY!! Sometimes I just want an answer, I need an answer or I have to have a response. I have realized over time that my response has no countdown, I can take all the time I need to sort through whatever it may be. I rush myself to process which causes me more mental frustration. I don’t have to figure it all out at once. Breathe. Let your mind simmer down first, the calmer you are the easier it will be for you to process properly.

I know a lot of people overthink, and its o.k. You will get through your thoughts, you are stronger than your mind games. Keep pushing, the fact that you are thinking shows you want better for yourself. I believe in you and you should too.

~The Mouthy Introvert

Trigger Happy

I remember this one time me and my cousin and favorite uncle went out back with our bikes and set up ramps and jumped them like we were the black motocross lol man that’s one of my favorite memories one of my most cherished memories even tho at the time I didn’t know that was the last time I would ever see my uncle the same and that his life was slowly coming to the end as it still was happening right before me.

The loss of my uncle was one of the most traumatic events that I have ever experienced. I remember vividly his face and the warmth of his voice and the how excited I get even now remembering who he was.

This post is about triggers and protecting your energy. At the young age of 6 I experienced a shift in my mental health that I didn’t know until now really made a difference. I was TRIGGERED and I didn’t even know it.

As a black girl in a black family where “that’s just how I am” was their definition of “mental health.” Yes, this is a stereotype but I’ll be the first to admit that the shit is true. As a race we do not recognize mental illness when we should and when we find out we pacify it with ass whoopins and ridicule. THIS SHIT IS REAL! For those of you who are just tuning in I have bipolar disorder, “YEA BITCH IM CRAZY.” I have been riding this wave for a very long time and I am finally in a place that I know how to thrive in any mental state.

 But seriously this diagnosis has taken over some points in my life and I have finally came to grips with what I need to do for my mental stability. I recognize my triggers and I do my best to stay away or keep them to a minimum. Does it work? yea, at times it does but other times I have the same struggles I had as a teen with exercising self control. Triggers can be anything from lack of sleep, lack of exercise, too much sugar, and being around people who are generally not good for your mental health.

I chose to write about this today because I know how it feels to not know how to feel, if that makes sense. I wish I could be “normal” but that’s not my destiny, I was created to be unique. I have learned so much about myself in this last year it’s scary. I now recognize that I have the potential to make myself better, to allow myself to learn through the ups and downs of my “mental illness” and to become the best version of myself. But most of all I can bring awareness to what some people experience, sometimes in silence. I have a list of my potential triggers and I finally feel that I can use this list to dodge the bullets of life’s ups and downs. I feel like I can strategically navigate my life to success, to peace,and to growth. I finally wanna take care of ME, and there is no catch. I love my life and all of the bullshit that comes with it. I just wanna make sure that I can be an inspiration, some motivation to those who are in search of the answers that seem to just have fell into my lap.

Aight that’s enough… that’s enough, I just spilled my guts! Wheeeew that took a lot but it felt therapeutic, I feel lighter. Sometimes I just wanna let it all out but I’m still a G, don’t get it twisted I’ll still beat yo ass LOL!

I can’t just let it all go, at least not yet.

~ The Mouthy Introvert

Light that shit!

I bet y’all thought this post was about me blowing it down with Mary Jane but no, this a little different type of smoke. I am referring to burning old habits and creating a new way of thinking for yourself. I personally have a hard time breaking old habits but I am human and a work in progress and I am not afraid to admit that.

Now what I will burn is sage! Does it work? No damn clue LOL but the act of smudging negative energy out of my house has some type of a placebo effect on my mental and I legit feel better afterwards.

Some people fight with how their life tends to go, I was once that person. I saw everything that happened to me as negative and now I tend to roll with the punches. I firmly believe that there is a reason behind everything. Yes, we do have free will but a lot of what happens is already written in our path. The road to becoming a better person is full of twists, turns, wrecks and do overs, but at the end of the day its a process just like everything else. The only way to get better is to keep trying. Don’t overthink anything, it is what it is.

So light that shit, and let your ancestors guide your spiritual cleansing or whatever it is you are trying to accomplish. Just let the negativity go and press on.

~ The Mouthy Introvert

January Theme

Oh to be Unbothered!

It seems like the most difficult things that could possibly happen, happened in 2019. But I cannot dwell on the then, I can only focus on the now. I have lost so much of myself in 2019 but, I did gain more confidence as an individual and learned that I am not as hopeless as I have felt lately. Sometimes we get a reminder to just DO BETTER and that may be all we need to get that motivation back again. I may not be perfect but I have never worked so hard for myself in my entire life. I have to be that person that nobody thought would be what they are today but not for clout, but because that person that I will be isn’t average. She is extraordinary in life, love and her mental capabilities.

Although I have no idea how 2020 will go, I do know that I will continue to roll with the punches. I encourage anyone out there who is struggling through something or towards something to just keep going. Be mindful that if it was easy, everybody would be extraordinary and then we would all be “normal” . Some of us are meant to stand out and do great things, embrace that and exist in present moments

~ The Mouthy Introvert

“No New Friends”

This has to be the dumbest quote of the decade. In my opinion its always great to have great people in your circle that motivate you and elevate you to the next level. New friends mean new connections. Sometimes those old friends who have been in our circle but aren’t talking your same lingo need to be replaced or just dealt with in a different realm.

Real friends give you what you need and not always what you want. I think this generation is so fixated on winning on their own that they don’t value the benefit of having motivated individuals in your friend circle to help you get to the next level.

Teamwork makes the dream work.

2020, I see you creeping up on me

Alright, am I the only one wondering where the hell did the year go? But no need to look back, January is almost here.

What am I getting myself into

So I have my goals set and I’ll go over them in future posts so you guys can go on this journey with me. Some of them I have already accomplished (yay me!) But, just like any normal person I have questioned whether or not these goals are attainable.

I am easily overwhelmed and I’m feeling like my goals may add to my stress but at the end of the day shit has to get done and there is no need to stress about it. Knowing that I have a plan and a great support system can help me stick to the plan and reach these short term goals that I have that will ultimately lead to all of my larger goals.

Alley-oop

If you have a goal and a plan it makes it a lot easier so why not attack it? So here I am about to attack the hell out of the next few weeks towards setting myself up for 2020. 2019 was tough for me. I went through a lot of changes but I am proud for what I grew through.

Anybody got some instructions for this shit!?

Alright alright, I get it damn! You don’t have to throw it in my face (me as I sit and talk to life). I know that I have to step outside of my comfort zone to grow through the experiences in this changing time in my life but, wheeeew! If this isn’t the most uncomfortable energy I have ever stirred up then I don’t know what is.

You got this, I think

Let’s face it, change is uncomfortable. But getting comfortable in the uncomfortable is the key to transitions. I must admit my anxiety is in Super Saiyan mode but I am making a good effort to keep it together for the sake of learning and growing through what I go through.

Nobody said this would be easy, but at least make the shit fun

– The Mouthy Introvert

Being Mindful

When you feel like you are losing your mind

Bitches be out here constantly reliving an incident or setback that really had them feeling crazy. That situation continues hold them back and they are the only ones responsible for cleansing themselves of that hurt and pain.

It’s me y’all…..I’m bitches

I hate to burst your bubble but, life isn’t meant to be easy. At the end of the day we all are going to go through something that’s going to shake the foundation that we once lived on. Our jobs are solely to “Bob The Builder” our shit back together, heal, learn and keep it moving. Life doesn’t stop for you to get it together, it keeps on moving so grab our “spendanight” bag and let’s gooo!!!

Sincerly, The Mouthy Introvert

Damn! Time Flies

Some of the happiest moments in my life I probably won’t remember. Hmmm must be remnants of my childhood that I took for granted not knowing Geoffrey was right; I don’t wanna grow up I’m a Toys R Us kid! But here I am damn it, 3 months into my thirties (wheew chile).

Not what I expected

Yea, I know we all had a plan of being this or that by a certain age but sometimes (most times) it doesn’t work out that way. But don’t fret or be disappointed. What we want for ourselves isn’t always what’s best and once we realize that, we can be content in knowing it’s just not “my time”. A close friend dropped a gem on me recently about milestones and time constraints. Let that shit go! What’s for you is for you and when it’s for you that when it will be right. So with that being said, here’s to a new part of my life, new experiences, reconnecting with myself, and growing through what I go through.

                                                                                                                  Sincerely,

  The Mouthy Introvert